Q: Tell us a little about yourself.

A: “My name is Shizune Ishizawa, I’m in eighth grade, I have an older brother and I play ice hockey, and I’m allergic to cats, despite being a cat person.”

Q: What is your favorite class and why?

A: “My favorite class is middle class. I like money, but rich people are annoying. You should totally give me all your money though.”

Q: What hobbies/sports/clubs do you do and why do you like them?

A: “I like hockey because the rules are pretty simple and straightforward. It would be nice if the referees weren’t blind and deaf though.

Q: What is something you are proud of?

A: “I can keep your money safe for you if you don’t trust your local bank! If you put all your life savings in a bag and leave it out on your front porch, at 3 a.m., I will come and pick it up for you. 100 percent guaranteed, check out my reviews on Yelp.”

Q: What’s an interesting/unique fact about yourself?

A: “When I eat, I chew with my mouth shut, because I have basic human decency.”